Stop Seeking Recognition

Remember this: if you do things from the heart, you will always be recognized. If you do good work simply because you want to, then somebody will say something about it.

Now, if you do things just to get recognition, then you'd never be satisfied with yourself.

Recently, I cleaned up my e-mail list. I did give several heads-ups in my e-mails about my intentions of unsubscribing a bunch of people who only had two stars by their names. Those with at least three stars are those who occasionally open my e-mails, while those with 4 or 5 stars are those who almost always open my e-mails. Now, while I don't expect everybody with 4 or 5 stars to always read my e-mails, I do expect that those big-star types would open the e-mails to AT LEAST see if I cancelled classes. That is why I put the most pertinent information at the very top of the e-mails so nobody would have to scroll down my book-size e-mails!

Those who open the e-mails are those who are most engaged with my work. These are the people who are always keeping an eye out for my activity. These people at least see if class is going on, or check if I'm offering any other services besides ZUMBA, or actually just read the inspirational e-mails. I actually have people on my list who never came to any of my classes, but they just want to stay on the list just for the inspirational e-mails.

Now, most of these people would probably NEVER say how much they appreciate my e-mails. But, this doesn't mean that they don't. They just simply don't say anything. I have no idea how much of an impact that I'm actually having and I may NEVER know. But I do know this: when I see those 4 or 5 stars by people's names, then I know that they are engaged. I don't even know most of those big-star types, but I could hope that I'm having some impact on their lives.

And no, I'm not asking for recognition. Why? Because I don't need to. If I'm doing good work, then somebody will say something. Usually, somebody does say how much they appreciate my work when I never asked for recognition. In the same way, if YOU are doing good work, there is no need to look for recognition. Somebody will say something even when you're not asking for it.

But even if somebody doesn't verbally express their appreciation for you, they will show it by their actions.

When I was working at a warehouse, I worked hard. A bit too hard, because my body was aching and I was losing too much weight. Nobody ever said how much they appreciated my hard work. Instead, the supervisors would ask me to do more work -- mostly because most of the workers didn't want to work. 

But one day, two supervisors actually asked me if I wanted to permanently work in a very easy section in the job. I mean, my lifting and sweating days were pretty much over! When I started working in this section, it was like paradise! I still ended up quitting the job, but had I stood, I would have had an easier life on the job. The only reason I could think of as to why the supervisors had me work in that easy section was because of who I was and the kind of work I did. They were watching me. They never said "Good job!" or anything like it. Their way of giving me recognition was to give me easier work to do.

See, I'm confident in my work because I do it from the heart. Whether or not somebody says something about my work isn't important. I know how to recognize if somebody thinks that I do good work. Just like with the e-mails, if I see a bunch of 4 and 5 star people, I know that they appreciate my work. If people unsubscribe from my list, then I know that they're not interested in my work. No hard feelings. I'm just not the person for them.

If people keep coming to my fitness classes, then I know that they appreciate my work. If people don't return to my classes, then they're not interested. No hard feelings. Nobody needs to say "I love your work" or "I don't care for it." Their actions would tell me how they feel. 

Do you have a social media page where you're seeking to get followers? Somewhat recently, I've discovered that people could actually purchase a bunch of "phantom" followers for their Facebook pages. I could buy a bunch of "likes" on my Facebook page, so that when you see all those "likes," you'd think I'm super popular! But before you click "like" on that Facebook page, scroll down and see how many of those followers are actually engaged. If a page has 10,000 likes but barely any of those people are liking their posts, then those thousands of likes were either purchased or "enticed" (e.g. "Like my page and get a free [insert item here]).

Then you see the Facebook pages with thousands of likes and you see that all of their posts have many likes. That shows that people are actually engaged -- or in other words, these people actually appreciate the work on this page. 

People don't need to give you formal recognition for your work. You don't need an award ceremony, because they overall don't mean anything. They just make you feel good about yourself. But what you should look for are other people's actions. Do their actions show that they appreciate your work, or do their actions show that they could do without you? Hint: if you're still on your job, then your boss appreciates you, even if you disagree.

You could write a book and sell millions. That means nothing. If you write several books and the same people keep buying from you, that's recognition.

You could get a pat on the back at the job. That means nothing. If you try to quit and your boss tries to convince you otherwise, that's recognition.

You could be a teacher and have parents tell you how much they appreciate you. That means nothing. If the kids actually like coming to your class, that's recognition.

If you're a parent and your spouse says you're doing a wonderful job at parenting...nope, that means nothing.But if the kids actually want to spend time with you, that's recognition for your parenting skills. Of course, that doesn't mean that the kids always like being around you!

Don't seek recognition. Don't do things just to be seen. If your work is good, you'll get recognized. It may not be in a way that you want, but you'll get recognized. Focus on simply doing good work. Your good works will follow you and you'll be rewarded.